Mother's Day night

So I went to see him this evening and take him milk. It was time for his assessment and suctioning from the respiratory therapist. She flipped him over and did his suctioning. They take off the attachment from his cpap and pull out his nose prongs. Then they put a few drops of saline down in each nostril to loosen up any mucus and stick a little suction tube in his nose and then far down his nostrils into his airway. They also do his mouth and throat. So of course his breathing goes down and he struggles for air but he did not have get bagged in the middle of the suctioning like he usually does. However he did turn blue towards the end of everything and it freaked me out so much I had to look away. They hooked back up his air and it took him a little while to come back up to normal oxygen sats. The nurses let me know when he was ok. When he was able to, he let us know he was not happy. I heard the biggest cry come out of him that I have heard yet. It was adorable. I put my finger in there while the therapist cleaned up his face and he grabbed on and was squeezing so much that his fingers started turning yellow from loss of blood flow. He started releasing and squeezing over and over. I made the comment that he was pumping iron. lol. After they finished cleaning his face up I got to change his diaper again. I finished and the nurse began doing her assessments on him. He then began to open his eyes. I started talking to him and he turned his head to where my mom and I were standing and stared at us. This was the first time my mom got to see his eyes so she was excited. I moved my head down to where the arm whole is on the side of the incubator and kept talking to him. He turned his head even more to the side so he was looking right at me and opened his eyes even more. When I stood up to talk to the nurse his eyes followed me, then I bent back down and he looked to where I was. At one point he moved his mouth up a little to where it looked like he was smiling and then relaxed his mouth again. I wasn't sure if I was seening things, so I asked my mom if she saw that and she said yes. I asked if he just smiled and she said it looked like he did. I was so happy it made my heart jump. He watched me until his eyes got tired and then he slowly closed them so he could rest. The nurse flipped him back over onto his tummy and he reached out so I put my finger in there and he grabbed on again and held really tight. Sorry this blog is long, I just got so excited that he was doing so much tonight that I wanted to get everything written down so I didn't forget. It really wore him out because once he fell asleep he was out like a light. The down side to the night, my bp is still elevated. We will see how it is later and what my doctor says in the morning. Have a good night. I am going try and go to bed...they give me Ambian to sleep...it helps out a lot since they wake me up so much at night to take my bp, the meds help me go right back to sleep when they get done.